Stage 2B Patient
We are each a little different, even though we go through similar things. I had a double mastectomy in April 2012. I got my spacers / stretchers placed at the same time of the removal, and that helped me some, I think. I never had the completely empty feeling. My spacers, however, were a bit uncomfortable and foreign. After a certain amount of healing, the doctor would gradually fill them up every week just a little bit more and stretch the area so I could get implants. I received my implants in September, and they are much more comfortable.
I ... still struggle with depression. It is a permanent disfigurement. I lost my nipples ,too, so ... nothing will ever be the same. There is numbness in my chest that keeps me from the snuggles warmth that I loved with my husband. Some feeling has returned, but it will never all come back. I am okay with the fact I had cancer. I am okay with the fact that I am changed. I am okay with the fact that I look really good in my clothes. I had an amazing husband that makes me still feel loved and beautiful, and our relationship is better than ever. I look forward, though, to the day that I can wake up and not think about the fact that I am forever changed in the first few minutes.
I pray for your journey, that it will be one that enhances your life in positive ways moreso than negative ones. God Bless you.